Comments on Bannable Offenses: So Goddamn Simple

Entertain, while consuming a bucket of alcohol? I...

2009-11-04T12:56:29.733-08:00

Entertain, while consuming a bucket of alcohol? I can totally pull that off.

--Church Buckets are fine. It's strictly BYO...

2009-11-03T21:07:48.459-08:00

--Church

Buckets are fine. It's strictly BYOB-ucket. Don't forget you have to be costumed, on foot and able to entertain me while consuming said bucket at my residence. ~.^

and yes WV... no, I don't know anyone around Richmond.
Why? Because it's a different f@#king state! lol XD

Kahsha, your profile says your in WV. So am I, so...

2009-11-03T11:29:24.551-08:00

Kahsha, your profile says your in WV. So am I, so where do I get this container of alcohol next halloween? Buckets are containers right?

To give him the benefit of the doubt, I'd say ...

2009-11-03T09:01:36.283-08:00

To give him the benefit of the doubt, I'd say that he has run into the same kids again. Aside from that, the familiarity is eerie.

Not the whole thing, but it looks like some of the...

2009-11-03T08:36:54.094-08:00

Not the whole thing, but it looks like some of the lines were copy/pasted, yeah.

So uh...Is it just me.. or is this a cut and paste...

2009-11-03T08:13:48.437-08:00

So uh...Is it just me.. or is this a cut and paste from last year's Halloween?

I work at a language school for kids in Vietnam. H...

2009-11-03T02:34:30.534-08:00

I work at a language school for kids in Vietnam. Halloween just happened to fall on the weekend when we have most of our kids classes.

Joy.

Apparently trick ot treating to my classes meant going to other classes and throwing as much crumpled up paper through the door as is humanly possible, whilst the kids inside try and throw it all out again.

On the one hand, I now have nightmares about tiny little Spidermen and Grim Reapers throwing paper at me. On the other, I'm pleased I now have a Vietnam flashback story.

You weren't there man... you weren't there...

But Dave, think of all that useless energy you'...

2009-11-02T23:27:13.822-08:00

But Dave, think of all that useless energy you'd waste beating up the morons. Honestly, tell me that's worth your time?

Just do what my boyfriend did - Hand out apples to the people who didn't dress up. Sure, you may still be giving beggers food. But you know those F&$@#*S are stingy and only want candy.

Besides, if they decline your apple, then you have double the reason to beat the crap out of them, and take whatever candy they did manage to get away from them~!

Back when I was still young enough to trick-or-tre...

2009-11-02T23:07:56.485-08:00

Back when I was still young enough to trick-or-treat (I'm waiting for when I have kids to take out), I once dressed as Robin Hood, despite being a girl, with a real longbow and some arrows (sans tips) as my costume. It was GREAT! People love it when you have real weapons! Well, as long as you're not using them to actually hurt them...

Hahahaha! I had freaking full fledged chain mail a...

2009-11-02T20:48:09.444-08:00

Hahahaha! I had freaking full fledged chain mail and plate helmet for my "costume". I wanted to borrow my friend's great sword, but he was already using it...

None the less, it was, without a doubt, the biggest haul of candy I got in all my years of trick-or-treating.

There is a simply, yet messy solution to this prob...

2009-11-02T19:44:53.906-08:00

There is a simply, yet messy solution to this problem.

Dog terd.

Any kid that shows up without a costume gets some fertilizer in their bag. Tell 'em its European Chocolate.

If you run out, make sure you ate some salad or somethign with alot of fiber. It's a win/win situation. They get theirs and your pants get to feel more loose.

Tell me you didn't give those idiots candy. I ...

2009-11-02T19:02:29.072-08:00

Tell me you didn't give those idiots candy. I wouldn't have!

What I'm curious about is why it's sociall...

2009-11-02T18:57:16.694-08:00

What I'm curious about is why it's socially acceptable if it's asking for candy on that one night. What if a group of teens ring on your doorbell on Halloween night and one asks you for a jar of mayonnaise or peanut butter? Or even if he could use your toilet? Would it suddenly get weird? According to society, yes. But candy? No, take as much as you want.

I don't hand out candy. I DO allow trick or d...

2009-11-02T18:30:57.547-08:00

I don't hand out candy.

I DO allow trick or drinking but you must be fully costumed.

My neighbors dressed as Pope Mercedes (in full Papal regalia) and The Dead Guy (dressed in a suit but being pushed around the street in an actual coffin).

You bring the container, the house fills it with their choice of alcohol.

Back before we had a rug monkey of our own to take...

2009-11-02T18:12:29.225-08:00

Back before we had a rug monkey of our own to take out for Hallowe'en, we had a sign that went up on the front door every October 31st. A very simple sign that even a moron could decipher, with only a little help from his or her mommy. That sign says:

"NO COSTUME, NO CANDY. NO EXCEPTIONS."

Any morons that showed up at our door begging for candy in their jeans and winter coat (we do, after all, live in Alaska) with some lame line about they're dressed as "trailer trash" or "a punk" was answered with a mute finger pointed at the sign in front of them, followed by the sound of the door slamming in their face.

Then came the silly string from remote-triggered concealed spray cans mounted above the door...

yeah... no one around here dressed up. :( and it w...

2009-11-02T18:11:43.834-08:00

yeah... no one around here dressed up. :( and it was over at around 7pm wtf